Day 65: An en-chanting evening…

I was running late from a busy day of work and I had a hundred things on my mind.  The list of tasks to get done seemed endless.  Meanwhile, I couldn’t help but stare at my Buddha statue that sits in front of me as I work. I wondered what the evening event would be like and did Buddha know something I didn’t because his contagious smile had me finally letting go… I made the executive decision to just stop, breathe, smile and re-focus.

Alas, I said “Goodbye” to my computer, and got ready for my journey to the Buddhist temple.  I made sure to wear a skort, light rayon top with my sling-back sandals, a hint of lip gloss and a sweater over my shoulder just in case I became chilled.  With Siri as my guide, I left the drive and made the conscious decision not to listen to music but try to center my spirit for what I was about to experience.  My heart was racing as I found myself feeling a little anxious and uncertain.  Yes, Buddha sits on my desk, and I have studied a little bit about his life, but I have never attended a chant, a Buddhist ceremony or even stepped foot in a Buddhist temple.  What if I am expected to participate or even chant along with everyone?  I certainly don’t know the words…  Right then, I had to stop the overwhelming fear and just go with the flow.  Whatever happens… happens…

I arrived a minute late to the temple, but noticed there were several others that were running behind as well.  I have lived in Reno for some time and have driven past this temple but have not noticed it until today.  As I walked up the stairs that led to the front door, my heart was beating even faster. I stopped for a moment to snap a couple of pics of the signs and architecture before walking in.

As I stepped through those doors of uncertainty, my worst fear came to be, as the Reverend picked me out of a group of 5 and extended a warm greeting as if he knew I may not have belonged.  He then asked if I wanted to make an offering.  I was caught very much off-guard as I began to fret that out of everyone walking in, he had to ask me!!!  I said with a confused and cautious crackle of hesitance in my voice, “That would be great ….”, but before I could continue he said, “Perhaps you are uncertain on how to do that?”  I said with the biggest smile, “You are absolutely right!”  He said, “No worries! Just walk up to the table in the middle of the aisle and take an incense stick and light it.  When you light it, think of the greatest teacher you have ever had and let those thoughts and energy go as the incense lifts into the air.”  I smiled and said, “Thank you for that!”… All the while worried I would do it all wrong-in front of the staring eyes of an entire congregation.   As I walked through the door to the temple I was awestruck at the altar that was just ahead.  It was adorned with statues, pictures, candles and I could feel a pure and peaceful energy that I knew my mind was craving on this day… as if it were just meant to be.

I walked up and lit the incense and thought about my Grandmother and the many lessons she has taught me… to be kind even on a bad day, to share when there is little to give, to always love with all my heart… And with those thoughts, I watched as the incense drifted away and was offered to those not seen but understood to be there…  I placed the stick ever so gently in the sand and watched for a moment as the stick slowly decreased in size with a subtle orange glow and the smoke gracefully floated to the heavens.  I sighed for a moment and turned to make my way to an open seat.

Suddenly the door to the right of the altar opened and in a procession walked in about 12 people both men and women dressed in black robes with different colored stoles wrapped around their necks.  They each took their place by kneeling near the altar and the Rev began to speak.  He graciously thanked everyone for attending and put my mind at ease by saying that we weren’t expected to know how to chant; the programs we were given when we entered had the words to the chants and so if we felt comfortable, we could participate or we could just enjoy.  He then began with a prayer and the first chant began.

For those not familiar, as I wasn’t before attending the event, here is an interpretation of what a chant is, according to http://buddhism.about.com/od/becomingabuddhist/a/Chanting.htm , Chants serve a purpose, “not to worship a god, but to help us realize enlightenment.  Enlightenment is awakening from one’s delusions, especially the delusions of the ego and of a separate self.  This awakening is not intellectual, but a change in how we experience and perceive.  Think of mindful chanting as a tool for helping you wake up.”  They went on to explain that a mantra is “a short sequence of words or syllables, often chanted repetitively, thought to have transformative power.  An example of a mantra is om mani padme hum, which is associated with Tibetan Buddhism.  Chanting a mantra mindfully can be a form of meditation.”

I sat and listened and this is what I heard:

New Recording 6

I tried to relax my mind and open the door to the words being chanted.  I thought about all my worries fleeing as if 30 butterflies were released into the air.  My heart rate was now at its usual 48 bpm, and my breathing was slow as a turtle, and my spirit, it felt light as air.  I was at peace…

The ritual lasted about one hour and there were varying types of chants with one prayer that was sung by the group and the sound was simply angelic.  One aspect of the chant that surprised me was how the group interacted.  That is, in between chants they tended to smile at one another.  They were real people, not stoic and cold, their love emanated from their voices and the sound echoed from the tallest part of the wood trussed ceiling.  The congregation and others in attendance appeared friendly as we all had a reason why our paths converged on this one night in this one Buddhist temple.  Perhaps our reasons differed for why we there, but our hearts and minds were open to whatever message we needed to receive.

As the chant ended and people began to leave, the Rev said “Goodbye” and welcomed us all to attend their regular ceremonies in the future.  As I left, I stopped on the sidewalk as if I were taking my first breath; perhaps my soul had ordered it… I was thinking about how nervous I had been before the ceremony to be doing something completely new and foreign… and that before walking into the temple, my mind really was open to whatever the experience might be and yet, in hindsight, I felt so honored and humble to have had the invite and experience to make an offering, let my soul be nourished and my heart feel content.  I then felt this sense of accomplishment. Sometimes, we need to step outside our comfort zone, do something that scares us, be brave enough to walk through the doors of uncertainty, ignore what others may think and walk down the path of wisdom and enlightenment because you never know what tomorrow will bring…

Feeling happy, worry-free, and most certainly at peace after this enchanting experience… Wondering, but not worrying, about what tomorrow will bring…